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emo42
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Name: Paul
Location: Allentown, Pennsylvania, United States
Birthday: 5/11/1990
Gender: Male
Interests: Edge
Power Violence
Twitter
War
No Peace
Message: message me
Member Since:
3/13/2005
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| I honestly need to get my life together. Alright within the next year this is how I want my life.... Maybe playing in a band if it goes somewhere great if not no big sweat off my back. Being in college taking my generals also deciding what I'd like to have as a major. Such has becoming an engineer, graphic designer, photographer, maybe even taking over my grand fathers business. That's that goal and I really need to reach out there and get it going.
lets do it paul.
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| People are just funny as fuck and fake. I might just fall under that as well, just because I keep my mouth shut and don't give two fucks about what people think. High school drama about what someone said about someone and saying it to someone else is fucking stupid get over it. If someone tells you something about someone just shut the fuck and and not give a shit. He said this, than the person comes to you saying you said this when people than make stuff up and add on it to. Hold up let me drop some names in this entry. hahaha
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| I don't drop names in my blogs, I don't talk about anyone. I just say how I'd like to have some of my old friends back. How I wish I hadn't changed. I wish I was nerdy still, hanging out with my best buds I've know for years. So if you wanna talk about how I've spoke about you on here talk to me about it. I hate the world and a lot of people. I'll fake my smile to you in person, and keep to myself. I will not trust anyone, not even you.... that's all I have to say.
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| Don't you wish you could just go back to this year when me and you were in love and happy. Probably the best times of my life. Everything has gone down hill for me since me and you split up, I wish it never happened... but I feel like if we get back together things will become how they use to be. You probably will never read this since you havent been on since 2007. I really need to get to a doctor and get on meds. In the past 2 or 3 weeks I've been thinking alot. about life, death, friends, family, why we are on this earth, and just everything. Life is short and we should all enjoy it. Not only because we do not know what is held in the future but for the reason that we have people on this planet we can bond with and adore. I miss us. I miss seeing you everyday. I miss kissing you. I miss making you laugh, smile, and blush. I've sat in the front room on my house for house just thinking I wish that me and you could go back to being 16 again, and meet all over. I wanna be the shy, kind hearted person I was back than. The person that I am now is bitter, lost, soulless, careless, doesn't have a single goal right now. I've been completely lost without you. I know that I have called you crazy, a psycho, a bitch, and numerous over names but I'd like to say that I'm sincerely sorry. You and I have never really sat down and spoke to one another about our relationship problems and we really should have when we were together. We dated for 4 years and I loved every single moment of those 4 years. Anyways this is kind of getting long. Over all I hate everything, everyone, and I really need to change weather it is that I go on meds for my depression or do what ever I have to. I need to stop holding everything single little thing inside of myself. Knowing that I try to make every single person in my life happy at once and trying not to disappoint some one at some point in time really stresses me out all the time. Either I'm dealing with people I know I should help or not help I try. Im just ranting now but I'm sorry. Im also posting this on my page.
sorry.
love you paul.
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FUCK YOU.
To those who are concerned don't be.
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